Interesting points you've made, PaulWestNet. Also interesting that the usual ways of determining which driver might work don't work for this motherboard (I tried).
For folks reading along, my contact at Intel is pretty thin, it's been years, and I'm not even sure he's still in that role. So if you know somebody at VMware or Intel who can weigh in here, by all means, don't wait for a (slight) chance for me to get somewhere with this in the near-term.
Thanks!